


I keep longing ... -25/11/2019

by DrPHSribbles



Series: Untangled Words [2]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Gen, Thoughts of myself, random thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-28
Updated: 2019-11-28
Packaged: 2021-02-26 03:55:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21597232
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DrPHSribbles/pseuds/DrPHSribbles
Summary: This piece of prose needed a home. So, here it is!
Series: Untangled Words [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1556488





	I keep longing ... -25/11/2019

In all my ambitions and dreams, In all my desires, In all I plan, I plan always with the underlying aim, and longing for peace, for balance, for no more hurt or worry. Constantly I plan, I hope that in the future I will not worry, that my life won’t be a constant state of reckoning, a constant state of self-restraint.

Everytime I dream of moving somewhere else, every moment I aspire for distance from the places I have felt worry in, I am hoping for the confidence on the ground I stand, to feel at peace with what is around me, to feel like I don’t have to worry, to feel not the hurt that is in my heart. I am longing for the liberation from the self-imposed chackles that drag me away from what I’d do if only … If only I had the money… If only I didn’t have to worry about this and that… if only I could choose the problems and challenges that I have to live with.

Chances are theses desires are too utopian to ever accomplish. Most likely I will never find the peace I am looking for, the quietness, and balance I know lacks in my soul right now. I think I have heard it somewhere that if I can’t find them with what I have in whatever moment and conditions I have in my life right now, the likelihood is that I will not find them ever. I guess that makes sense. But I can’t help feeling that if just a few worries that constantly bare down on my shoulders were lifted, as if by magic or skill… I could be happy, or at least have peace, have balance.

Maybe there in lies the secret…to not worry, to just do what feels right, for life is painfully finite and all I have, all you and I will ever have is this exact instant, for the future never arrives, and the past is not now, and we’re prisoners of the relentless marching of time into the uncertain unknown of now!


End file.
